Sponsorship & Widows...

It’s been a little awhile since I wrote up a blog/email. It’s been quite the crazy few weeks.

It’s August, which means update month for all of our children in our sponsorship program. Every three months, we go to all of our projects and take updated photos and information on our children. I then compile them into little update pages and send them to the sponsors in North America. Last Saturday, alone, I did this for 45 children.

It’s a lot of work but I thoroughly enjoy it. I get to watch the expressions on the children’s faces as they answer the questions or tell their stories. I love it when we tell the kids to smile for the camera and some are either too shy to smile or some just burst out laughing with sheer excitement.

Last week, Anne, Hoglah and I went out to a village that the whole TI team went out to a month ago, where we did assessments of over 20 families: grandmothers with orphan grandchildren or widows with children. The last time we went to the village, we met these families at a central location; this time around, Anne, Hoglah and I went to their individual homes. That day we walked over 15 kilometers and visited many homes.

The first home we went to, we had to walk down a deep, beautiful ravine and back up again. We arrived at the home of Sophia and her children. Her husband had died a few years ago, leaving them with about 3 acres of land but no money. We walked into their smoke-filled home of mud walls and grass roof. There was a small jeico (gee-koo – a small coal like BBQ) in the corner cooking some rice in the corner. The smoke from the coals was filling up the home; my eyes were stinging. I looked around the house to find a half a bag of something (either rice or corn), the jeico and a bench under the roof. That’s it. That’s all that they had in their home. I asked Anne why this was all they had. Anne asked Sophia and she said that her husband was the only son in the family and when he died, his family came and took everything. He, being the only boy, would be the one to care for his parents in their old age but since he was gone now, they “felt” they had the right to his things. Those things would take care of them, perhaps?

And since Sophia was simply an in-law, she had no right to them, even if she was the mother to their son’s children. Thankfully, the one thing she had was the land. But because of no money, planting in the farm was pointless so she rented it out to a nearby community member. It gave her some money, for a little while, to provide food for her children. Food being far more important to her, than a couch or bed for her and the children to sleep on.

Sophia is beautiful. When we arrived, she welcomed us with the biggest smile. I remembered her smile from when we first met her a few weeks before that. She had such a young and beautiful face and she hugged, big, heartfelt hugs. My heart ached for her….for all the homes that we visited that day. They, for the most part were all very similar…in their conditions and situations.

It’s overwhelming; it’s heartbreaking. This is just a small village outside our town, in the deep interior. We didn’t reach every home, every widow, and every heart breaking story in this village alone. There are still so many people in our area we haven’t visited, children we haven’t heard about. And with the decrease of food happening, the increase of prices….this will bring along the increase of extreme poverty. It’s frustrating.

We can only imagine the more difficult times here to come in the next year.

I was in Nairobi last week to pick up Sean. Yes, Sean is finally here! For those of you who haven’t heard, he did make it safely. I’m sure you NACers will hear from him soon. The poor guy hit the ground running here. We spent all of Thursday on a bus back to Kitale. On Friday, he had to endure the wonderful, crammed matatu rides, a corrupt police check (or 4!) and walking up a steep hill…to get to one of our projects. But I think it was worth it when he got to hug on a few beautiful Kenyan children. And just wait until he tells you about our children’s home and his bonding with some of the kids on the Saturday. Yeah, he’ll do great here. J

As this next week begins and more craziness, I’ll keep you posted…as always.

Oh yeah, we have kids on our website that need to be sponsored. Go to www.transformedinternational.org to check them out.

Part 3 - Kenyan Wedding

A friend of ours got married on Saturday, here in Kitale.

The wedding was to start at 10:00 am. Weddings here usually start in the morning and go until about 5:00 pm (the reception). It’s much different from our usual North American weddings – starting in the afternoon and going until midnight or so. :-)

We arrived at the venue at 10:20 am, knowing very well that it was not going to start on time. The tent was still not up; more than half of the guests hadn’t arrived yet and the groom hadn’t even left to go and pick up the bride.


The bridal party tent...

The groom goes with his wedding party to pick-up the bride from her home where she waits with her wedding party and parents. The groom remains in the car while the best man goes in to the house to get the bride. The best man lifts the veil of the bride and confirms in front of everyone that yes, this is in fact the woman that the groom is to marry. Then they are all off to the wedding…the jest of that part anyway.

So the groom in this case, left the venue at about 11:00 to go and pick up his bride…which was about 45 minutes away. The choir from their church was there to entertain us for awhile with music. Daniel, Tim, Josh and I played with and talked to some of the street kids who had come to see the ceremony as well as little children who were with their parents. I held a beautiful little baby named Jessica and had her giggling and smiling up at me (yes, I wanted to take her home with me).


This is Jessica...staring up at me...isn't she gorgeous?!?!?

Finally, at almost 1:00 pm (3 hours past the supposed start time), we could hear the cheering from children and the sound of the cars. The bride, groom, wedding party and parents of the couple, had arrived.

The groom walked in with his groomsmen and ring bearers, slowly, toward the special tent and chairs for them. Next were the bride and her entourage, including her parents. She too, walked slowly toward the special tent and chairs.


The groom's entrance (he's in all black)


The bride and her entourage...

The bride and groom sit in chairs across from each other, about 6 feet apart. Then a guest/pastor gets up and reads a bit from the Bible, gives his advice to the bride and groom and then the choir sings.

Because the wedding was almost three hours late and it’s rainy season, we could see from the distance the rain clouds coming in. So what would’ve been a far longer ceremony was being cut shorter and shorter to prevent the dumping of rain on everyone.

The bride and groom were then called up to the front. The groom lifts the veil in front of everyone…to again confirm that this is the woman that he is to marry. They again stood about 6 feet apart from each other, never holding hands and even when repeating their vows, never looking at one another. The only time there was physical touch was after the rings were placed on each other’s fingers, the pastor held up the ring hands and joined them together. The “you may now kiss the bride” that we are so accustomed to in North America was now, “you may now reveal your wife” and the groom lifted her veil. No kiss!


The bride and groom...



The joining of hands...

Everyone stood up and cheered for them at that moment…hooting and hollering!!!

And the rain came….

We all ran for shelter in the school that was there. Daniel, Tim, Josh and I ended up in the area where all the kids also ran for shelter. It turned in to a great time, sitting with a bunch of little kids in the rain. We ended up missing the opening of gifts. Yes, after the ceremony, they then open up all the gifts in front of everyone. Then the reception started; some food was served and I don’t know if there was dancing. We ended up leaving as the rains wouldn’t stop and we were all hungry (we didn’t get any food – too busy playing with the kids!).


My beautiful Evans...I adore him.


Hanging out....


Hanging out again. Yes Kate, that's Collins in the red. He says HI!!!!


Faith & Me...a gorgeous smile - her, not me!


Moses & me - before the wedding started.


Tim & Me...killing time before the wedding.

It was interesting; the wedding as a whole; and very different. I know there is love between the bride and groom but it lacked emotion, lacked excitement. Yes, I guess this is coming from an emotional woman, a woman who fully intends on taking advantage of the whole “you may now kiss the bride” thing. I fully intend on standing close to my groom, holding his hand through the whole ceremony and pretty much looking at him and only him the whole time. So be prepared!!! :-)

I love seeing different things; different cultures; different reactions to situations. I know not all Kenyan weddings are like the one above; it depends on the couple getting married. But I liked seeing a different side of a wedding…definitely different from any other wedding I’ve been to before, especially in North America. It’s another story for me to share with you…to give you a little taste of Kenya and the beautiful people in this beautiful country.

Part 2 - Emotional Friday

We have a grandmother, one of the sweetest women EVER, taking care of her five grandchildren, their parents having died of AIDS.

I’ve talked about this family before; they lived in a 10x12 mud house with tin roof. Their home consisted of one room that served as a bedroom, sitting room and kitchen. There was a little 1x1 window that allowed minimal light in throughout the day.

On Friday; however, the TI team moved the grandmother and her five grandchildren to a new home. A home that has two rooms: a bedroom and a sitting room and an outside small hut to serve as the kitchen.


The old house....

We arrived at their old home, to see that they had everything packed and were ready to go. We hired a small pick-up truck to load their belongings in. Yes, all of their belongings…ALL of them….fit in the back of a small pick-up truck. We loaded the truck up, the community children gathered around to say good-bye to the family and off we went.


All of their belongings - fitting in the back of a small pick-up truck...


The community children coming out to say goodbye to the family....


My little Kevin...he pulls at my heartstrings...we have a special bond.

We arrived at the new home; the children were in awe of the little property they had, the trees that surrounded their home and the welcoming greetings they were receiving from the neighbours. The children could not wipe the smiles off their faces.


Their new home....

Anne and I met with the grandmother and grandchildren for a few minutes. When we were done talking, she ran over to Anne, wrapped her arms around her, kissed her cheek and shouted, “Thank you so much!” in Swahili. After she was done hugging Anne, she ran over to me and said the same thing, tears in her eyes. I hugged that woman back with all my might, told her that I loved her and we thanked God together for being able to make this happen for her and her grandchildren.

It was wonderful to see this family so excited about moving to a new home, a whole new community and starting fresh. It’s a little step for them…in the right direction. And it’s great to be a part of it.

After getting the grandmother and grandchildren all settled, we headed over to another family that we are supporting to do their monthly food delivery. This family is a disabled Aunt caring for her three nephews. She doesn’t have children of her own and is not married; she said she gladly gives all that up to care for her three boys. They are her family.

When we arrived at the home, it began to downpour rain. Not just a little rain, hardcore downpour…that turned in to hail balls. I was thankful for this opportunity; for I got to see the way they really live.

Their home is made completely out of tin sheets with wood framing. There is no window in the house, only the front door. They have two rooms: a bedroom and a sitting room. The sitting room also acts as the boy’s bedroom. They have no couch, just a few chairs and a table. The floor is the boy’s bed.

When you walk in to their home, you need to step down in to it. This normally wouldn’t be a problem, except when it rains. The front of their complex (like a rows of homes built together) floods and the water comes rushing under their front door, in to the sitting room…also known as the boys’ beds. The joints where the iron sheets meet, rain comes down in to the sitting room and the bedroom. Because the rain was so hard, it wasn’t just a drip-drip into the sitting room, it was as if a water faucet had been left on. We all had to move around the sitting room, trying to find a place in the small room where there WASN’T water leaking through.

This was reality to me…and that night, the children were going to sleep on a wet floor with no bed, no mattress and no blanket.

Anne, our social worker, looked at me. I had to hold back the tears. She said, “Meredith, do you think we could take some of the money (from the sponsorship) and have a bunk bed made for them today? We’ll buy mattress and a few blankets too. That way by tomorrow or so, the boys will be able to sleep on a bed.”

Of course! For the boys to have to continue to sleep on a wet, cold floor was saddening to me. That’s what part of the sponsorship is for….to care for these children’s needs. No wonder the boys have been sick so much in the past. No child should have to live like that.

It again, was reality of Africa, reality of a third world country, slapping me in the face. There is so much work to be done, so many children, widows and grandmothers to help.

Yes, it can be overwhelming, knowing that there aren’t a few hundred or even a few thousand out there that need help. No, it’s in the millions. If you look at it that way, yeah, you might want to give up, think it’s too much to do, to accomplish…but we don’t think that. We look at it in the way of helping one child, one family at a time and trusting in God to lead the way. Seeing a child’s smile come across their lips because now there is some security….security in knowing that he/she will have food every day, security that they won’t have to go to bed on an empty stomach for the second, third or fourth day in a row…that’s what it’s all about. Caring for the orphans and the widows…loving them they way they deserve to be loved, so desperately wanting to be loved. That’s what I love…loving them.

We may say, “What a small world”…but in fact, it’s a big world with BIG problems. We can’t turn a blind eye to it. Let’s open our eyes to more than just what’s going on in our own backyards.

Part 1 - National Music Festival

This past week has been fairly eventful. And to save time on a super long email/blog, I’ll put it in to 3 parts.

Part 1 – National Music Festival

My sweet friend Lydia (from Oasis of Hope) invited me to join her, Geoffrey (also Oasis of Hope) and their taxi friend, Dan to Kisumu on Wednesday to watch the National Music Festival. It’s not really a festival; it’s more so a competition of different categories of music and dance among the primary schools and high schools around the country. There were about 12 children from the Oasis of Hope group homes that were competing in the festival with their school and so we wanted to go and cheer them on.


Lydia & Me....

We arrived in Kisumu (2.5 to 3 hour trip) in mid-morning to book in to our hotel, relax and grab some lunch before seeing the first group of children perform. We arrived at the high school where the festival was being held and took our seats. Our group of kids performed second in their category and they did very well. One of the other schools that was performing in the same category was a school for blind children. They came out holding hands together and getting help on lining up…and they could sing. It was beautiful; they were beautiful.


Our boys performing...

About a third of the way through that category, a lady passed a Visitor’s Book for Lydia and I to sign, so we did. After the group of children performed, the MC announced that there were some special guests today and at that she announced Lydia’s name of Oasis of Hope and my name of Transformed International. We had to wave to the crowd, completely embarrassed. Then we were invited to sit in the special guest section…the front of the hall and on couches, not the hard wooden chairs. We got served tea and treats, along with the judges.

At the end of the category, I was fiddling around with my camera when I heard my name being called over the speakers. Lydia nudged me and I looked up at the MC. She wanted me to go to the front of the hall and present the second and third place schools with their certificates and the first place school with their trophy. So I did!

Then we got up to leave as the category was done and our kids were finished. But the MC and a few others insisted that we stay for the next category. So we did and it was the dancing competition, which was so much fun to watch.

Later that night, we drove around I got to see the beautiful sunset over Lake Victoria. It was absolutely beautiful….and romantic. Unfortunately, Lydia wasn’t in a very romantic mood, she wouldn’t even hold my hand. :-)


Lake Victoria Sunset - just beautiful.

Afterwards, the four of us went for dinner in Kisumu town. We suddenly saw a sign for PIZZA. I miss pizza. So we went in and sat down. Lydia and I were excited…almost drooling over the wonderful list of pizzas. And then the waitress came over and said, “We don’t have pizza. We don’t have cheese.”

I looked at her, “Seriously? You don’t have cheese?”

“No, we don’t have cheese.”

Lydia said, “Can you go to the store and buy some?” She was HALF joking…and a part of me was thinking, please go and get the cheese! So no pizza for us!

The next morning we were up early, and off to see our kids perform again. They did well again in the category they competed in. Unfortunately, they again, didn’t come in first, second or third. There was also a beautiful group of children competing in the same category; they were mentally and physically disabled children. I was in love with all of them. In fact, there were about 40+ children that I wanted to take home with me…but they wouldn’t all fit in the little Toyota taxi we were driving in.

We had a few hours break in between performances so the four of us decided to go for drive to the Dunga (Doon-ga) Beach. We drove in and immediately were asked if we wanted to take a boat ride out to the lake to see the islands and the hippos. We declined so then they decided to show us the fish that had just been caught (Kisumu is big for the fish as it’s right on the lake). So Lydia and I ventured over and I saw the biggest catfish EVER…not that I’ve seen many….but it was huge.

Then, this is the fun part, as we were leaving the park, a man stops us at the gate and says that we owe 200 shillings (about $3 CDN – which I know doesn’t sound like very much but 200 shillings is a lot here). It’s then that we see a sign (on the INSIDE of the entrance gate – not the OUTSIDE – BEFORE you enter the beach) that has the fees on visiting the beach. The fee for a bus full of children is 100 shillings, a 14-passenger van is a fee of 50 shillings and then it says, “International Foreigner” is a fee 200 shillings. We all argued with him but after about 10 minutes of annoyance, Geoffrey paid the 200 shillings…all because of the color of our skin. Two hundred shillings to look at a few dead or dying fish. Yeah, not happy about that!

Then we found another place to go to…free….to go and just look out at the water. We ended up being joined by a bus full of children so Lydia and I got photo happy and took pictures of all the kids. There was one little guy who kind of tugged at a heartstring of mine. He asked if he and I could take a picture together; so we did.


School bus of kids....covering my face. :-)


Daniel & Me - he pulled at my heartstrings. Beautiful smile.

Then another school arrived and I immediately got excited. It was the school for the mentally and physically disabled. I greeted all the children, confirmed with them that they were in fact that school and told them how wonderful they did in the competition. They were completely surprised…that I remembered who they were and was congratulating them on their efforts. They were absolutely beautiful.


The school for the mentally & physically disabled.

Then it was lunch time and then we rushed back to the school and watched our girls perform. I spent a lot of time, playing with this little boy in front of me. I gave him a lollipop I had in my purse; he looked at it very strangely and showed it to his mom. She unwrapped the lollipop for him and he sucked it back. When he was finished, he was sticky…so, being always prepared, I pulled out my handy-dandy wet wipes and got his hands washed for him. The wet wipe was another amazing first time thing for him to see. After he was done, he handed the dirty, used wet wipe back to me with a big smile on his face. Thank you!


Our girls performing


My little lollipop friend.

After the performances (all the kids did a FANTASTIC job!), we headed back to Kitale. Oh, home sweet home!

I’ll be posting pictures on my blog soon…today or tomorrow….of our Kisumu trip. Check them out.

http://www.meredithlopez.blogspot.com/

Part 2 of my week…coming soon. :-)

Love you all,
Meredith