Preparing To Leave....

How do I start my blog? How do I write all the emotions that I’ve been going through the past two weeks? I have had moments of joy and excitement and moments of sadness and depression.

As I prepare to leave Kenya on Saturday, I’m filled with so many different emotions. I know I’m only away from Kenya for two months but it seems like a lifetime to me right now. Yet, I’m SO excited to be coming to Canada to visit family, friends and prepare for the new chapter in my life – becoming a wife to an amazing man (craziness!).

About a week and a half ago, I hit a rock bottom, something I haven’t hit in a VERY long time. I’m continuing to process through things, continuing to understand things and of course, continuing to learn things. It’s been a great time for me to increase my trust in God, to have deep conversations with Him, to expose myself, my fears and my heart to Him even more. I had days of complete breakdown in tears if someone asked me how I was doing, or if I held one of my kids at HBF or hugged on a street kid.

Last Tuesday, Sean and I spent the night out at HBF, our last day/night with them. We arrived in the late afternoon, the children ran over to us, “Auntie Mary, Uncle Sean! Auntie Mary, Uncle Sean!” We did crafts and took lots of pictures together. When it was time for bed, I went to the girl’s room and us girls sat up for a few extra hours, talking, laughing and sharing stories. When I curled in to a bed that I was going to share with Lydia, I cried, overwhelmed that I was not going to see them for the next few months.

As Sean and I were getting ready to leave the next day, I told the kids that I would see them in a few months. Stella, Veronica and Linda told me, “No Auntie Mary, you’re not going!” After a bit of discussion, they feared that after getting married in Canada, I would decide to stay there and not come back. So they thought that if I didn’t leave Kenya, then it would be a safe bet that I’d be staying here. I had to promise them that I was coming back to Kenya but even as I was leaving, their hugs were a little tighter, a little longer and the whispers of “Nakupenda Auntie Mary!” (means I love you) in my ear, brought the emotions to the surface again.

On Friday, we had our second annual TI Christmas Party for all of the children in our sponsorship program at our compound. There were over 250 people that came and yes, most of them children. It was amazing!!! I have to say that we were quite organized this year. We hired people to be the cooks so that we could spend more time with the children and guests. Each of our projects prepared a song as entertainment to the whole group…that was so entertaining. Each child in our sponsorship program received a gift bag that included pencils, erasers, candy, toothbrush and an extra gift: a toy for the little ones and a t-shirt/top/ for the older ones. Thank you so much to Newmarket Alliance Church for their support this year in sponsoring the Christmas Party. It was a complete success. The TI website will have an update with lots of photos on it early next week. Check it out at: www.transformedinternational.org

This final week here has been a busy one. I’m visiting the remaining projects to do the updates on our children for the sponsors back in North America. In the evenings, we are visiting with friends to say “see you in a few months” to. Sean and I leave Kitale on Friday morning and will spend the night in Nairobi. I’ll pick up my wedding dress on Saturday, do the updates on two kids that we sponsor in the Soweto slums and then Sean and I will be “leaving on a jet plane” on Saturday night (Kenya time), arriving in Toronto on Sunday night (EST time).

I’m not one that minds Change; life is full of them; but depending on what the Change is, I just sometimes have a hard time getting used to them. I remember seeing a bumper sticker or a sign once that said something along the lines of change is something that never changes…it will always be there. I’m simply changing my location for a few months from my home in Kenya to my second home in Canada. I’m changing my status from single to married. And although I’ll miss my home here like crazy for those two months, I’m beyond excited for the change that is to come -- becoming Sean’s wife.

So, for my family and friends here in Kenya, I’ll simply say, “I’ll see you in a few months!” and to my family and friends in Canada, “I’ll see you in a few days!”

I love you all so very much.